Peace! Kalilintad! Shalom!

Category: Fr. Jom Baring, CSsR

  • How much do we value our relationships?

    How much do we value our relationships?

    April 16, 2025 – Wednesday of the Holy Week

    Click here for the readings (https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/041625.cfm)

    How much do you value your loved ones? How much do you value your friends? How much do we value our relationships? When we value so much these people in our lives, their importance are shown in the way we spend much of our quality time and presence. When we also truly value people who are close to us, the more we become less and less self-centered. What becomes natural to us then is the way we give ourselves for those whom we value so much. These can be expressed in concrete ways like sharing our material resources, making ourselves available for them, giving an effort to understand and listen to them.

    This is how we grow and mature as persons capable of loving and giving life especially when what we experience is a mutual sharing of life and love.

    However, the value that we give to each other can also be spoiled. When we ourselves turned to be “life-sucking” or persons who suck and consume the life of others – then, we surely spoil and degrade the value of our relationships. This makes us attention-seekers, guilt-trippers and energy-consuming creatures to our family members and friends. This also means that we do not actually give value to people but we are only concerned on what we can personally gain and benefit from others.

    This is how Judas turned to be one, as he betrayed his friend and master. Judas sold Jesus. He even dared to ask the chief priests of the temple, “What are you willing to give ME if I hand him over to you?” And for 30 pieces of silver, Judas was most willing to hand over and betray Jesus. The value was not that much but Judas valued Jesus so little. He was willing as long as he could benefit something immediately.

    Well, why would Judas do that to the person who only showed kindness and generosity to him and to the people? Judas though, was chosen to be one of the close friends of Jesus and disciples had these two attitudes that motivated him to betray the Lord and to sell him for thirty pieces of silver.

    First, Judas never believed that Jesus is the Lord and the Messiah. He never believed in the Son of God who was sent into the world to redeem the world and save the people from their sins and evil ways. Judas never believed in Jesus but only thought that Jesus was a mere teacher. Thus, Judas never called Jesus as Lord but only Rabbi, which means teacher.

    Second, Judas did not have a close, personal and intimate relationship with Jesus. Because Judas never believed in Jesus as Lord, it also followed that Judas had never developed that close relationship with the Lord. Judas actually failed to build true friendship and closeness with Jesus. Hence, he could not recognize God in Jesus.

    These attitudes of Judas may also be present in us. When we do not believe or refuse to believe in Jesus as our Savior and Lord, who has come to love and forgive us, then, we too shall have the difficulty of not being able to build a personal relationship with God. Failure to recognize God in our life leads us to a distanced relationship with God.

    This is also true with our human relationships. Failure to believe in the person, to a friend, to your beloved, to your husband, or wife or child will lead us to a distanced relationship. This failure in knowing the person and building personal and intimate relationship with the person will lead us to easily discard the person. It will be easy for us to hurt them, to cause them pain, to cheat on them, to betray them, to leave and abandon them – because after all, we are never committed in that relationship. And because we don’t value that relationship.

    Thus, we are called rather now to know better the person that we are in relationship with, our friends, our beloved and all those people around us. It is in knowing them that we come to recognize their importance and believe in them. And again, this shall also move us to truly value our relationships by committing ourselves in those relationships by developing a close and intimate relationship with others and with God. This is manifested in the way we give life for the sake of others. Kabay pa.

  • Transformed by God’s Care

    Transformed by God’s Care

    April 10, 2025 – Thursday of the Fifth Week of Lent

    Click here for the readings (https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/041025.cfm)

    In a relationship, when we express our care for each other, then, it helps us to grow and become mature. Through mutual care, we are able to give emotional support and understanding, express affection and assurance. In times of difficulties and challenges in our relationships, it is in showing how we care for each one that we too find strength, develop our closeness and intimacy.

    We realize how “care” can significantly transform us as individuals and our relationships. This would express the capacity in us to go beyond our comforts and fears in order to care for others. Such capacity as it grows in us make us life-giving.

    The readings we have today also remind us how care brings and inspires transformation. So, let us discern the readings we have today.

    In the Book of Genesis, we have heard about the transformation of Abram to Abraham. This transformation of name is not just merely by name but it has a deeper transformation in the very person of Abraham. Let us remember the story of Abram who was from the land of Ur. He was called by God to journey to a land God promised to him.

    Abram had to leave behind many things which included the comfort of his home, familiarity of the place, affection from his family and friends. Yet, Abram trusted God despite the many insecurity he felt. He took the risk despite the uncertainties ahead.

    That trust in God must have been founded in his faith that God takes care of him. The Lord who has called him cared so much about him. That divine care desires an abundant life for Abraham.

    Indeed, his relationship with God earned him a transformation of his person. Abraham became the Father of many nations because of his faith. Through God’s care, Abraham was assured of God’s presence and faithfulness. God said to Abraham, “As long as your descendants keep the covenant, I will be their God and they shall be my people.”

    This is an assurance of God’s care and faithfulness in us. This is a promise that God will and shall never abandon us. This is a relationship that does not float in abstract form or a mere product of a “ideological and theological treatise” of the past. Rather, this is something that we experience in concrete ways as people of God.

    This is manifested and fully revealed to us through the historical person of Jesus. In the Gospel of John, Jesus provocatively proclaimed that he is “I AM.”

    What does it mean? “I AM” is YHWH’s sacred name which also means “I am always there for you.” This is God’s name that also expresses that divine care for us.

    Indeed, this is provocative and sounds insulting to the Jews because they could not accept that God is truly with us in flesh. For them, God should only remain in the heavens where nobody can go and no one can touch. God for them is very far, remote and distant from His people. They could not imagine that God cares so much about us to the point of being with us not just in spirit but also in flesh, in human form.

    What are the invitations for us then? And to you, graduates of Caregiving?

    First, like Abraham, God also calls us to take the risk, to trust God despite our uncertainties, insecurities and questions. God sends us to a situation we do not expect or even to places and events we avoid. Do not resist and let God’s desire be your desire too. Like Abraham we may learn to trust God and be confident in Him. Moreover, be comforted also at the words of God, “I am your God and you are my people. I AM will always be there for you.”

    We may surely encounter many discomforts, moments of confusions and times of difficulties in our relationships and in your work and professional life. Yet, never retreat from others and from yourself, but rather, be daring like Abraham, always trusting in God.

    Second, God is truly with us here at the present moment (in the here-and-now). Be confident today because Jesus is “I AM”, he who is there for you and me always. Thus, be conscious always of the present because this present moment is God’s present – gift to us. By being present to people whom you love, you too express in the best way your care.

    Third, be transformed by caring. Express care as your expression of love and affection. In your relationship with your family and friends, express caring and gentle words; make your touch always a form of care. In your professional life as caregivers, let your hands and your very person be an expression of true care that support and understand those who are sick and old. By your care, you will not only be the one who will be transformed but also those who are under your care. Hinaut pa.

    (A homily addressed to the graduated of Caregiver Professionals)

  • Let go of the stone of condemnation

    Let go of the stone of condemnation

    April 6, 2025 – Fifth Sunday of Lent

    Click here for the readings (https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/040625-YearC.cfm)

    Do we find ourselves rejoicing at the faults of others? Are we delighted upon learning that our sister or brother has failed? Do we feel victorious when others are found guilty and shamed?

    When we find ourselves rejoicing, being delighted and feeling victorious over the sins, guilt and shame of others – this tells us that something is also wrong with us. Our heart becomes an accuser to people who failed.  We feel righteous because we are not like them. Then, we make “labels” to others. These are forms of “name-calling or stereotyping” to magnify their guilt and shame. We become rejecting and condemning. We demand evil for evil.

    Yet, in the deepest of our hearts, are we indeed sinless, guiltless and blameless? Or do we only hide our own failures and sins by magnifying those of others?

    This very kind of attitudes that may be creeping in our hearts as well as in our culture have been revealed to us today. On this Fifth Sunday of Lent, the Lord invites us to look deeply into our hearts. And so let us explore the readings and embrace God’s mercy and forgiveness.

    The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman to Jesus who committed adultery. This whole affair of the scribes and Pharisees with Jesus was filled with malice and hatred directed both towards the woman and also to Jesus himself.

    In that culture, women were the only ones who can commit adultery. Men can’t. Women were perceived to be deceiver and caused of sin. This was the reason why the man was not in the picture.

    This culture was influenced by their machismo and patriarchal society. Hence, it was only the woman who was brought in the middle of the people. The intention was to shame her and not to bring justice. She was also brought there in an effort to kill her by stoning her to death.

    Such condemnation was so cruel. Yet, despite its cruelty and violence, people found delight and joy over it. They even demanded for such savagery because it was what the “law” mandated them to do.

    With the leadership of those influential scribes and Pharisees, they condemned this woman. With this attitude, they refused to give another chance and opportunity for the woman to change and redeem herself.

    They demanded punishment from Jesus who could also confirm such penalty according to the Law of Moses. This was where their malice and hatred towards Jesus was also to be found. They were trying to find fault in Jesus so that they too can accuse him of blasphemy and then condemn him to death. The thought of it gave them satisfaction.

    However, the event was turned by Jesus in the way they did not expect it to be. Jesus said, “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”  At this, Jesus redirected the condemning fingers of Scribes and Pharisees towards them. By saying that, Jesus brought them to themselves, to look at their sinfulness. To recognize who sick their hearts were.

    It was very interesting at how the gathered people responded. They began to look at themselves and found that each of them was sinful. Each one was not worthy to carry out such punishment towards the woman. Each one was also guilty.

    What was more interesting was the way St. John described to us the first initiative of the elders to leave first. The elders of that community left the gathering first because they realized that the length of their life also meant more sins committed.

    This Gospel scenario invites us now to look closely at ourselves and to examine better our intentions, thoughts and actions. We are invited also to be more understanding of those who failed but not in the sense of condoning such failures and sins. We are invited to be merciful rather than condemning.

    This is what Jesus showed to the woman. Jesus said, “I do not condemn you. Go and sin no more.” The beauty of the Gospel lies here. God has delivered his judgment and showed His mercy. Jesus freed the woman and was commanded to sin no more and not to go back to her old sinful self. She had, surely, found her way to freedom and peace in Jesus.

    Pope Francis in his homily on this Gospel story said, “Jesus forgives. But here there is something more than forgiveness because Jesus goes beyond the law. Though Jesus was pure and the only person who is worthy to cast the first stone against the woman, but Jesus did not because he showed mercy. ”

    Mercy, as the Pope says, is difficult understand. “Mercy does not erase sins. It is God’s forgiveness that erases our sins. But then, mercy is the way in which God forgives. ”

    Thus, unlike the scribes and Pharisees, Jesus saw more in the person of that woman. The limited awareness and refusal of the Scribes and Pharisees to see more, prevented them to discover that there was always hope in every sinner, and that there was more in a person’s weakness and imperfection. This is how Jesus defends us, sinners from the just condemnation of death.  And it is because God always sees goodness in us.

    We are all invited now to let go of the stones from our hands and in return embrace a family member, or relative or a friend whom we know have sinned against us. Only then that reconciliation will also begin in us. Hopefully, as we enter the Holy Week next week, may our hearts be ready to celebrate the Easter joy of Christ. Hinaut pa.

  • Break the Cycle of Invalidation

    Break the Cycle of Invalidation

    April 5, 2025 – Saturday Fourth Week of Lent

    Click here for the readings (https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/040525.cfm)

    Have you ever experienced being “invalidated”? This may take in a form of invalidating or discrediting our feelings, thoughts or person. What commonly happens is the emotional invalidation. This happens when we deny, reject or dismiss an emotional expression or feelings of another. It is a way of telling the person that his/her emotions are not important or wrong at all. This may be intentionally or unintentionally because we are not aware of such invalidation of other people’s emotions.

    Some expressions would sound like these. “You better move on. I have a similar experience like yours and I have move on already.” – advising a friend who is experiencing a heartbreak.

    “Don’t be too anxious. Anyway, we are here for you.” – as if comforting a dear friend who have anxiety attack because of pressure at work/family.

    “Don’t get upset and stop overthinking. There are always failures in life.” – an advice to a friend to brush off one’s feeling over a failure.

    “You better not feel that way. It was not the intention of the person, anyway.” – giving comfort and advice to a friend who felt violated, hurt over an action of another person.

    We might believe that by invalidating the feelings of others or the person himself/herself is our way of giving them friend support, comfort and understanding. However, this is not the case. By invalidating the feelings of others whether of a special someone, a family member, a friend or anybody else is not respecting one’s feelings and person. By invalidating others, we tend to focus our gaze on ourselves making our hearts apathetic and filled with prejudice.

    This kind of experience also happened to Jesus. There were people who tried to invalidate and discredit the identity of Jesus not just the thoughts and feelings of Jesus. They questioned his origins, his family background and status.

    People began to make reasons in order not to invalidate and reject him. The officers of the Temple and Nicodemus, a Pharisee were one of the few who were inclined to listen more to Jesus, yet, they too were invalidated and discredited by the chief priests and Pharisees.

    Despite the many signs and wonders that Jesus did, those in power and position continue to invalidate Jesus. In John’s Gospel, those signs were miracles that pointed Jesus as the Christ. Yet, the more the people also created reasons to invalidate Jesus’ person. Instead of looking at Jesus to find the truth, “they all went home,” as the Gospel ended today.

    The people went home and settled with their own beliefs. Their hearts remained unwilling to give up their personal agenda and selfish desires. They were unwilling to allow God to be their God. They too are unwilling to allow Jesus to challenge them and to change them in the way God desires them to be. Thus, instead of going back to the Temple or to the synagogue to pray and dialogue with God, they did not.

    However, the Gospel invites us today to refocus our gaze on the officers of the Temple and with Nicodemus who allowed themselves to be encountered by Jesus. It is through them that we are being asked also today to see Jesus clearly, to recognize him better.

    As there were many signs before that pointed to Jesus, let us also be more aware of the many signs God has given us today. There are many, every day, perhaps we just lack that awareness and keenness to recognize those signs of wonders and everyday miracles that Jesus did for us.

    As we recognize Jesus’s presence better in our life, let that encounter with Jesus to make our hearts more discerning. In this way we can break the cycle of invalidating others. Hinaut pa.

  • RESPONDING TO REJECTION

    RESPONDING TO REJECTION

    April 4, 2025 – Friday Fourth Week of Lent

    Click here for the readings (https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings/040425.cfm)

    Rejection from people can be painful and even traumatic for us. Its emotional impact could trigger sadness, anger, hurts, low self-esteem and anxiety. This could also affect our relationships to the point that we might develop unhealthy ones. We could form trust issues and doubt our self-worth.

    This very kind of human experience was not far from what Jesus received from people around him. The Gospel tells us how Jesus was rejected by his own people. Jesus had to go to Jerusalem in secret in order to protect himself from those who were trying to kill him. What he received was a rejection with malice. Those who rejected him desired to cause harm to Jesus. 

    Yet, even though he knew that he was in danger if seen in public, Jesus still took the risk to be there among his people. Jesus took the risk to speak the truth and make the truth known to all even though it may cause him his life. Indeed, this is God’s way of making himself revealed to us.

    Jesus did not deter from rejection, but he responded with grace. Jesus responded not with hatred towards those who rejected him but with the truth. This tells us that Jesus knew his identity well. His identity was anchored in his intimacy and oneness with the Father in heaven.

    This rejection of the presence of Jesus was a reaction of some powerful figures at that time. They felt threatened to the way of life of Jesus and to the message that he preached and lived. This was how Jesus caused turmoil among the powerful leaders in that Jewish society. Jesus was unconventional who ate and drank with sinners, forgiven them and freed them. He healed the sick and touched the unclean. He preached about a loving and forgiving God the Father.

    And as Jesus gained popularity among the ordinary people, the leaders were threatened at his knowledge and wisdom. Jesus was not a well-known intellectual and did not come from a rich and powerful family. And they felt offended.

    Jesus himself and all that he did threatened the status quo of the powerful people who were contented with their comfort. These “Jews” who in the Gospel of John were referred as the powerful religious leaders of the Jewish society, preferred a strict and vengeful God. By this belief then they could advance their self-interest. They too can use their position to enrich themselves at the expense of the poor.

    Thus, they were against Jesus because he was changing their ways. Their hearts were filled with bitterness, hate, anger and the desire to have more. These were the reasons why they could not accept Jesus or even recognize the presence of God in Jesus.  Their blindness and the hardness of their hearts made them incapable to understand the ways of God. Thus, they wanted to kill him, to silence Jesus.

    As we continue our journey in this season of Lent, may this Gospel reminds us of our tendency to reject others and to only believe our own ideas and perspectives. Let us also make the last week of lent as days of opportunities to humble ourselves. We are called to recognize areas of our lives where we have become complacent, too comfortable and arrogant so that our hearts may become more welcoming. Hinaut pa.